A week has passed since the momentous and exhilarating Adirei HaTorah event. It was there that close to 30,000 people came together to proclaim the glory of our yungeleit. Although the Ma’amad came to a close, the uplifting feelings and memories remain with everyone who participated.
HaRav Meir Tzvi Bergman, one of the Gedolei Yisrael and son-in-law of HaRav Elazar Menachem Man Schach zt”l, had flown in from Eretz Yisrael to speak at the event. When he arrived, he was unexpectedly cast into aveilus and sat shivah in Lakewood. Rabbi Yosef Heinemann relayed at the Ma’amad that when he went to be menachem avel, HaRav Bergman told him something that was weighing on his mind. HaRav Bergman said that when he speaks at the event, he wants to speak about a topic that pains him.
On the evening of June 4th, the night to give honor to our Adirei HaTorah. HaRav Bergman came into the room and thousands of people all stood silently until he reached the area of the dais. After his divrei hisorerus, he concluded by sharing how the Shidduch crisis weighs heavily on him. He wanted everyone present to understand him, so he worked hard and practiced saying it over in English ahead of time. Ultimately, he was able to give over the following in English.
“There is something that is weighing on my heart. The מצב in כלל ישראל with the amount of אידשע טעכטר that are struggling with שידוכים is heartbreaking. I would like to give over something that I heard from רבנו הגדול דער ראש ישיבה (HaRav Shach) דער שווער זצ”ל. One should be מקבל on oneself to be careful when saying ברכת המזון, you should say it from inside a siddur (bentcher) not say it by heart. And with the אייבישטערס help this will be a זכות that you should find your ריכטיגע זיווג בקרוב.”
Everyone was stirred by the gadol’s words. It was one of the highlights of the Adirei HaTorah event. It was a message that touched and resonated with everyone.
Soon afterwards, his message began to spread all over. Students were hearing it from their teacher. People were encouraging each other to bentch from a siddur or bentcher. A new degree of awareness was created.
The impact of his words eventually came back to HaRav Bergman. In response, he asked for an opportunity to be mechazek the girls in shidduchim. The Adirei HaTorah organizers agreed and, together with Nshei Adirei HaTorah, they were able to accommodate his request.
Nshei Adirei HaTorah is made up of volunteers who want to help promote the ideals and vision of Adirei HaTorah. It was they who right away jumped in last minute and made all the arrangements for this next event, scheduled for Tuesday, June 13th. Since HaRav Bergman would be speaking in Hebrew, Nshei Adirei HaTorah arranged for English subtitles to be available so everyone would understand his words.
Knowing that thousands of girls worldwide would want to join together for this night of inspiration and chizuk, direct feeds were arranged for girls in Chicago, Cleveland, Los Angeles, Baltimore, Denver, Toronto, Detroit, Minneapolis, and Florida.
At 9 PM thousands of girls from Lakewood, Deal, Brooklyn, Monsey, Passaic and the Five Towns gathered at Lakewood High School. The evening commenced with Rebbetzin Bluma Shapiro שתחי״ leading everyone in Tehillim for cholei Yisrael. The tefilos had a special focus on two of our Gedolim who are in need of a yeshuah; HaRav Shmuel Kamenetsky, shlit”a and the Mashgiach, HaRav Mattisyahu Salomon shlit”a.
Then, the much anticipated moment arrived when HaRav Uri Deutch, mora d’asra of Forest Park, Lakewood, introduced HaRav Bergman to speak. Lending to the chashivus of the program, the Lakewood Roshei Yeshiva were in attendance as well.
HaRav Bergman began by describing the virtues of the wives of talmidei chachamim. He relayed that those women who remain awake in honor of Hashem by waiting for their husbands who are out learning in the beis medrash, Hashem will pay them back in Olam Haba. Women who make sure that their home is a home for a talmid chacham, a beis Hashem, a place for the Shechinah to reside – they are called “yedid Hashem,” companions, so to speak, of Hashem. The critical role that the women play, to enable and nurture both their homes of talmidei chachamim and their future generations of ovdei Torah, forms the essence of Klal Yisrael.
He then referred to what he said at the Ma’amad. He clarified that even though Rav Shach said that bentching from a siddur is a zechus for other tzaros as well, he chose to share what he heard from him regarding shidduchim.
He suggested that the basis for this zechus is that the Torah says, “I will sustain you, I will satiate you, and through that you will thank Me.” It seems unusual that someone gives a gift and adds, “I’m giving you a gift and I want you to thank me for it.” A “thank you” is something that comes from gratitude; it’s not something you request. It must be that here the Giver is extending a promise to the one receiving the gift. “If you receive it, express gratitude, and recognize the chessed that lies behind this expression, I will give you further and greater opportunities to be able to again recognize My chessed and thank Me further.”
He mentioned that the Ponovezher Rav, during his hesped for the Chazon Ish’s mother, explained why the mother of the Chazon Ish was zoche to many children who were talmidei chachamim. It was all in her zechus because she had yiras Shomayim, of the sort that we mention in Eishes Chayil, “Isha Yiras Hashem.”The Gemara in Sanhedrin explains this refers to the selflessness of a mother who nurtures and gives of herself for the needs of her lomdei Torah.
He also shared what he heard from his shver, Rav Shach, who had a close relationship with the Brisker Rav. They were once walking together in Yerushalayim and they passed an outstanding talmid chacham. Rav Shach asked the Brisker Rav, “How was that person zocheh to be such a talmid chacham when his parents were simple people?” There did not seem to be any exceptional marks of greatness in his parents that such a talmid chacham should emerge from them. The Brisker Rav answered, “You didn’t know his grandmother.” Her zechus implanted and set the foundation for what would emerge a generation or two later.
This selflessness is the key to our chizuk while each one of us awaits our zivug. We were created to enable others, not for ourselves. The more giving we can be, the more we will feel the strength and wholesomeness of this period. The more we will be strengthened towards our own yeshuos.
HaRav Bergman ended with these powerful words: Ashreichem Bnos Yisrael that the future of Klal Yisrael depends on you because you are its future mothers. Let’s strengthen ourselves together to consider the unbroken chain of the glory of our mesorah. That commitment itself should be a zechus for every one of us be to be zocheh to zivugim hagunim b’ezras Hashem Yisborach.
He was full of emotion as he took the 3,000 names that were submitted at the event and gave them all a personal brachah in his own words. Each one of the Roshei Yeshiva were given the list of names and gave a heartfelt bracha.
HaRav Uri Deutch spoke next. He opened up by elaborating upon the words of HaRav Bergman to ensure that everyone would fully comprehend what was intended. Then, he said that although there is no need to add anything tonight, HaRav Bergman requested that he share some of his own thoughts on the matter. Since one should not refuse a Gadol b’Yisrael, he obliged.
To expand on the topic of birkas hamazon, HaRav Deutch quoted from the Meshech Chachmah that the key theme of birkas hamazon is to recognize the hashgachah pratis of Hakadosh Baruch Hu in every facet of our lives. By internalizing this message, we recognize that not only does he give us sustenance but he is the One who provides everything. And this is just as true even when we encounter dark moments in our history and in our own lives.
Furthermore, he relayed over powerful words from the Leshem, the grandfather of Rav Yosef Shalom Elyashiv. The Leshem tells us that we have two missions. One, to be continuously striving & growing and believe that will open the brachah of Hashem. And our other mission is to have bitachon; to believe that everything is from Hashem. Through this bitachon we can bring down the greatest rachamim from Shomayim.
He concluded by saying how every one of us believes that the Ribbono Shel Olam has a glorious future mapped out for us. Our task is to be mechazek and have bitachon. With siyata d’Shimaya we will be zocheh b’karov to individual yeshuos and the geulah for the entire Klal Yisrael.
Following the speeches, an uplifting video portraying the simchas HaTorah of the Ma’amad was shown to all in attendance. Then, as the moving night was coming to a close, the crowd was moved to tears by the hartzig niggunim. The inspirational charge of the event would be something they would hold onto for a long time.
The evening ended with the Rosh Yeshiva HoRav Dovid Schustal reciting kabalas ol malchus shomayim and mentioned from Reb Ahron zt”l that tefillah is the essence of bitachon because we recognize that hashem hears our tefillos and in this zchus our tefillos will be answered.
Reflecting on the Ma’amad and last night’s program, it gave over a dual message. One, Adirei HaTorah is more than just an organization. It is a mission for each and every Yid to recognize and internalize that the yungerman sitting and learning holds up our world and is the most treasured thing that klal Yisrael and Hakadosh Baruch Hu have in this world. And at the same time, the wives of the Adirei Torah are equal partners in this. They make tremendous sacrifices, enabling their husbands to sit and learn. Our cherished Bnos Yisroel are the future wives and mothers of the Adirei HaTorah and Tomchei Torah. This was a night to give them the recognition and chizuk they deserve.
