I’m not sure exactly when it happened, but sometime over the past ten years it has become the norm to begin looking for a playgroup for your child beginning immediately after Sukkos.
It doesn’t take a genius to realize how insane this is, but it’s the reality. Immediately after Sukkos is over, with my child having been in their new playgroup for less than a month, I have to start looking for their next year’s playgroup. How this became the accepted way things are done here is beyond me.
Besides for being ridiculous, I’m not sure how many people realize how complicated things get because of how the world of playgroups is run. Things happen in life, changes come to be, and people are forced to alter their plans. And planning to open a playgroup a full year in advance often doesn’t work out.
Take my situation. I have a two-year-old daughter, turning three next year. Right after Sukkos, I placed calls to the morahs that I felt would be right for her, and was happy to secure a spot with one that had a stellar reputation. My daughter met her and was very excited – though we had to try to explain that it would be quite a while before she could go to that playgroup.
Just three months ago, I got a call from another parent in the group informing me that the morah would not, in fact, be having a playgroup next year. The morah had undergone some major difficulties in her life and was incapable of running a playgroup the next year. So, I frantically ran around and managed to find another group that wasn’t completely full yet, and signed my daughter up to it. My daughter again met a new morah and took a liking to her.
But then it happened again. Last week, the morah called me up and said that she is very sorry, but things came up and she won’t be having a playgroup next year.
Not one, but two morahs canceled – months and months after we had signed up for them.
Look, things happen and I don’t necessarily blame the morahs. In both cases, their circumstances were unforeseen. However, I do blame the system we’ve set up. When you must sign up for a babysitter 11 months in advance, we’re asking for disasters like this happen.
We need to change this. If you’re a playgroup morah, or know of one, I urge you to not open the applications window until Pesach time. There is no reason in the world that parents have to sign up so early. And what is happening because of it is that parents are being given massive headaches.
The views expressed in this letter do not necessarily reflect those of Lakewood Alerts. Have an opinion you would like to see published? Send them in for review to Info@LakewoodAlerts.com
Maybe it’s because people won’t sign up until last minute so they won’t know if they have a full group and let’s be honest the way we do things especially in Lakewood if we don’t have to sign up so in advance it will be left until the last possible second. I agree 11 months is too long and there should be a middle ground.
A relative of mine who has a babysitting group gets calls all winter. She tells them she isn’t taking commitments until after Pesach. Sometime before Shavuos she let the people who reached out know registration is open, with the schedule and price. The first parents who committed and gave a registration fee got the slots. Within a day all slots were filled.
It’s so unfair to commit early and need to change the details at a later date.
Mrs ziva Krieger a”h instituted that will play groups should only begin registration after tu bishvat, unfortunately as soon as she passed away everybody went back to the old ways…..
Very sad.
She was an expert in early education and saw the detrimental effects of people committing so early not always knowing where the child will be up to the following year.
Besides for all the unforeseen changes that can come up, it boils down to a lack of belief in paranasa coming from hashem….
The rabbis tried to change this years ago. It worked for a little while but then there’s always the one morah who jumps the deadline because of whatever and then everyone gets scared so they jump the deadline too and that’s the end of the deadline. I agree with Paulina it’s all a lack of emuna
As someone that babysits myself I agree with you entirely. But just want to point out a view of some people that waiting too long will esult in lack of filling up which will cut into their parnasa. I personally waited until Pesach time to accept the children but I still am not full…